Guest: “Do you have Wi-Fi in this hotel?”
Receptionist: “Of course, sir.”
Guest: “And how do I log in?”
Receptionist: “Just open your window. It connects to the hotel across the street.”
Hotel guest: “Excuse me, this orange juice tastes strange.”
Waiter: “That’s not juice, sir. That’s the complimentary shampoo.”
Guest: “Your hotel promised me a sea view!”
Receptionist: “Sir, we are in Delhi.”
Guest: “Exactly my point.”
Guest: “The room is fine, but there’s no hot water.”
Receptionist: “Hot water is available only from 5 AM to 6 AM and 11 PM to 12 midnight.”
Guest: “That’s a gym schedule, not a bath schedule!”
Hotel Owner (to staff): “Remember, always say ‘we’ll take care of it’ when the guest complains.”
Guest: “There’s a lizard in my bed!”
Staff: “No worries sir, we’ll tuck it in and bring another pillow.”
Guest: “Can you give me a room and make sure it's quiet?”
Receptionist: “Absolutely. The elevator next to your room doesn’t work, the disco above your room is closed today, and the couple next door just broke up.”
Guest: “Great!”
Receptionist: “So you’ll only hear the plumber fixing the burst pipe behind your wall.”
Guest: “Excuse me! My room hasn’t been cleaned properly.”
Housekeeper: “Sir, we’re following eco-friendly rules now. We only clean rooms when the dust becomes visible to the naked eye.”
Guest: “I can barely see my bed!”
Housekeeper: “Perfect! That means it's working!”
A guest calls the front desk:
Guest: “There's no light in the bathroom.”
Receptionist: “Sir, did you try turning the switch on?”
Guest: “Yes, but nothing happens.”
Receptionist: “That’s normal. Our lights work on motion sensors—just dance a little!”
Guest: “Can I check out late?”
Receptionist: “Sure! How late are we talking?”
Guest: “About next week!”
A man walks up to the hotel reception.
Man: “I lost my luggage!”
Receptionist: “Sir, don’t worry. We’ll file a report.”
Man: “No, I mean emotionally. I broke up with my suitcase at the airport.”
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